Some Theories as to Why Adam Lind is Still a Blue Jay

• They've discontinued his hat size (XXXXL, unbendable brim, low enough to hide the fact that his hair line is perilously close to his eyebrows)
• Alex Anthopoulos is mesmerized by Lind's dreamy eyes squint
• Adam Lind has stumbled upon some rent control scheme and will be occupying the cleanup spot until he's a feeble old man 
• There's got to be some unknown metric we're ALL missing 
• The air conditioning at Rogers Centre is broken and they need the gusts of wind provided by his numerous strikeouts to keep the stadium cool during the summer
• The Jays have a warehouse full of #Lindsanity T-Shirts that they're hoping one day become relevant (assist to Connor McGuire on this one...)

Feel free to add your own additions to this list in the comment section!